NUMBER 1

This is gonna be bomb. Venting about people pissing me off...ha, who can ask for more?? So I'm pretty excited. You should be too, my vocabulary can get very colorful. So where shall I begin? Hmmm so many different annoying people...Got it! Let's start with the person who's been pissin me off the longest. Oh, by the way, I'm changing everyone's names for their safety AND mine. I'd rather avoid getting in trouble haha. And if any of the changed names are yours, don't be all like WTFUCK haha they're CHANGED. CHANGED PEOPLE!!!! Just way similar to their own names. Except for the ones I got a little creative on. Haha So! Let's be on with it then. Wow that sounded kinda british haha. Anyways.
MR. BALD RAT MAN
Mmhmm told you I was going to change the names haha. So this dear man...he's one of the teachers at my school, orchestra teacher to be exact. And you guys can report me to whoever you want. Freedom of speech thank ya very kindly. So back to Mr. Bald Rat Man. So what's with all these absences I'm getting? I mean sure I've been gone for two weeks but I've been there every day unless I have an appointment, but those are fucken like...excused. so go die. No I'm not even joking. Go in a plane and fly somewhere far away and just explode. Do EVERY one a favor. Jeez. K so anyways. Also, why...HOW am i failing?! What the hell?? ORCHESTRA. That's pretty much easy to pass with flying colors right? Nope, not right. Nope, Mr. Bald Rat Man pretty makes orchestra hell. Except for the first violins. They are his babies. And what's with putting me next to a guy who puts sweaters on inside out?? True stuff man. I told inside out dude about his sweater and he looked down the front inside of his sweater and was like 'uh oh.' and got up, in the middle of Mr. BRM's teaching...thing and TOOK OFF HIS SWEATER, flipped it inside out, and sat down like nothing happened. He...is one of the strangest boys I have ever known. Oh my gosh like...wow. But this isn't about him is it? It's about Mr. Bald Rat Man. Okay, and do you just hate me? Seriously? Because I honestly sense some hostility coming from you to me. It's kind of scary actually. I mean, I hate you too man. But come on now. I'm your student. OH!!! What the fux up with us not going to Florida? AKA the only reason I stayed in orchestra this year. AKA what you and the band teacher bribed everyone with?? K. Seriously not cool man. You, Mr. Bald Rat Man, are the only reason I don't look forward to school after two weeks. You are:
+harsh in so many ways
+rude. SO rude.
+discriminating
+a complete and total asshole
Yup, it's true. So I'm going to save the rest for another blog. Because trust me. There's SOOO much more. So much more. Onto the next annoying person! WOO! I'm liking this. I should've started so long ago.
ALICE
Okayyy. So you, my dear 'friend,' HAVE TO STOP FUCKEN COPYING ME. no joke it has been pissing me off since ninth fucken grade. Let's name all the things you've copied me on.
+purple skinny jeans (not a big deal anymore because everyone's doing that now but it still makes me mad that YOU'RE doing it)
+blue liquid eyeliner (just because I told you it looked good on you ONCE when you borrowed MINE doesn't mean you can just go out and buy your own. Maybe I was lying--we'll never know.)
+apparently you get hiccups everyday like I do. Oh, how convenient. Everytime I hiccup, you do. Oh look at that I just hiccupped. YOU MISSED ONE! HA.
+wearing skinny jeans in the FIRST place. In ninth grade you said you wouldn't ever. But it's all you wear now.
+my fucken HAIRCUT. a week after I get blunt bangs, you come up to me at school looking all happy and I wanted to punch your smile right off your face. Your hair looks horrible. And it pissed me off when my friend took your side.
+that one colorful hat I got like three years ago. You had your GRANDMOTHER make it. Just in different colors. Wow, sorry thats sinking low.
K people. I know it sounds immature that I'm whining about all this shit. But seriously I've been trying to make my own style this year. I don't need her screwing it up. Seriously. If you're a girl, you might understand. But I don't EXPECT you to. And I'm sorry if any of that sounded mean. Actually I'm not hahaha. But if you have a problem with what I'm saying please tell me. I'll TRYYY to tone it down a bit. No promises though =] So anyways. I really don't like how you've been totally following me around like a little puppy dog 'alice.' reallyyy. it gets way annoying. GR. onto the next annoying person! bamsauce this is bomb.
MICHELLE
So. Little Miss teacher's pet in orchestra. Chick who wears heels who can't even WALK in them. God you bug me. Sorry. So last year. I was sitting in club and I called Mr. Bald Rat Man an ass or something...something like that. You came and were like 'So, what satisfaction do you get out of being a bitch?' I was like ...wait YOU'RE asking ME this?! little miss pinched up face and HELLA bad hair chick? Oh no. You definitely did not say that. I may be acting nice to you this year. But HOOOOOLY fuck you should hear what I'm saying about you in my head. You are a complete bitch to everybody in orchestra, and you seriously need to take like a billion chill pills or like ten midol because your moodswings are just INCREDIBLE. in the worst way possible. They're awful 'Michelle.' You NEED to control your anger, because they're affecting the way people look at you. You may think you have tons of friends. Maybe you do, but you're going to lose them all because you turn into a complete and utter asshole so many times. Like especially during our sectionals in the morning. EVERYONE IS IRRITABLE IN THE MORNING. You don't have to make the atmosphere worse. So. And it really freaks me out that you wear my older brother's sweatshirt. That actually makes me scared for his health. I don't want him getting any thing you have. Ew. *shudders* Person number four!!
KOOKOO
So we had a good run. For almost four months. Then we kept fighting, and I really couldn't deal with that anymore. So why can't you support my decision, even if it means you getting hurt? I COULDN'T DEAL WITH IT ANYMORE. i felt TRAPPED. I couldn't wear things I wanted to, I couldn't hug any of my friends who are boys [i did anyway, oops.] I couldn't do almost ANYTHING. So I had to do something about it. And I am sorry. Really. I hate hurting people. But when it's for my benefit I feel like I have to. And now, you text my mother asking if you can give me a list of all the reasons why you love me. You think that's going to help?? No. It wouldn't. It would've just made everything harder for the BOTH of us. Why can't you see that. Honestly. Sorry, I'm just done. I'm done. Okay? FINITO.
SHORT, DISPROPORTIONATE CHICK
Oh. My. GOD. Honestly, you are SO ENTERTAINING. But people don't come more annoying than you, THAT'S for sure. Holy hell. You come into my history class and just randomly start talking to me about your health issues and Mr. Bald Rat Man. OMG. Ready?!
'oh my god, Mr. BRM is going to fuck me up the ass with my violin [...that makes absolutely no fucken sense at all...] because I forgot my violin because I had to go to the neurologist because my body fat level is 3 percent and it's supposed to be 4 to 5 percent! [.....what the FUCK!?!? Weight, first of all, has nothing to do with a brain problem, which, FYI neurologists are actually for. Second of all, if your body fat level is 3 percent, mine is like negative 10 percent. I can honestly stick two of me's in you. K that sounds really gross but you get it.]' and you just keep going ON and ON and ON...and in chemistry!!! YOU GO DOWN EACH ROW TELLING PEOPLE WHATS WRONG WITH YOU. WHY?! Honestly...you...I have no way of describing you. You just never be quiet. And when you thought Mr. BRM was squeezing your arm too tight--he wasn't. He really wasn't. And I know I'm taking his side for once. But seriously. He was barely even touching you. So stop whining. And maybe you do have a brain problem. But since you've got things a little backwards maybe you should go to a nutritionist. Because maybe...to you, brains go to nutritionists as to body fat goes to neurologist? Hm. Things to ponder.

So that was fun, right?! Well okay it was HEAPS of fun to me. So, I really think you should comment about this. I do want to know what you think, this being my first little bloggage and all. So thank ya for bein bomb people!!
~mel~